Let's not let them eat cake: Part 1

If there's one thing you need to know about us, it's how Outback Steakhouse has sustained us at different points in our lives. We know that it's not that great as steakhouses go, but the steak is completely irrelevant to us. We love the bread. We love the emu art on the walls. We even love the Yardley lavender soap in the bathrooms (a consistent presence from Maine to Maryland).

But all of these loves are eclipsed by our feelings for their Aussie Cheese Fries. Smothered in melted cheese and crumbled bacon, an otherwise ordinary appetizer is elevated to the heights of perfection by their special ranch dipping sauce. Taste-alike recipes for this dipping sauce abound, but none that we've tried has ever gotten it exactly right. It is this enigma that keeps us coming back, or, in some cases, traveling to other states to find an Outback... but that's another saga, and we're getting off topic. What does this have to do with wedding plans?

As much as we love Aussie Cheese Fries, we're just lukewarm about cake. And cake is, of course, a wedding tradition onto itself. One of our earliest wedding ideas was to nix the cake and replace it with a tiered display of Aussie Cheese Fries glory.

Why we didn't do this: By the time we got married, there was a substantial list of reasons not to go through with layers upon layers of fried potato, cheese, and pork product. Here are a few:

1. By the time we got married Dave had become lactose intolerant. He now enjoys this treat sparingly with the assistance of Lactaid caplets. 
2. The nearest Outback Steakhouse to our wedding reception was almost 70 miles away.
3. It would have been reasonably disrespectful to other people's dietary needs.
4. Really, cheese fries for dessert? It's just gross.

What we ended up doing: Stay tuned for Part 2...